Vibrators Effect On Pleasure & Intimacy
I’ve seen a growing number of clients who identify as female that have expressed they’ve lost desire, feel disconnected from their partner and are unable to orgasm during sexual intimacy.
When I ask about their self-pleasure practice they share that they use a vibrator to experience orgasm.
The intention of this post is to create awareness about the effect vibrators can have on your pleasure and intimacy.
Vibration has its place and can be very useful and pleasurable when used with awareness. If this is you, keep doing what you’re doing, enjoy!
But if you’re feeling disconnected from your partner or you’re feeling like your pathway to pleasure has become a very ingrained and narrow pattern or habit, this article is for you.
Are you able to enjoy subtle and sensuous types of pleasure – the gentle and gradual teases as you gradually build to climate ecstasy?
Are you using the vibrator to force the orgasm out of your body?
It’s important to remember that sex and pleasure are more than an orgasm.
Which nervous system is more active while you’re using the vibrator?
Sympathetic – Fight or Fight, Anxious, Stressed, Agitated, Panic, Mania, Hyper-vigilant
Parasympathetic – Rest and Digest, Numbness, Disconnected, No emotional capacity, Freeze
If your Sympathetic Nervous System is dominant intimacy will feel stressful, it requires a lot of energy, which can then make connection and pleasure feel like a chore.
Most of us live fast paced lives, we’re experiencing enough stress already, and our sympathetic nervous system needs regulating. Sexual intimacy and self-pleasure are opportunities for us to regulate and harmonise for our health and wellbeing.
During sex, intimacy and self-pleasure we don’t want either of these systems dominating. If the parasympathetic nervous system is dominating this also causes feelings of disconnection, along with feeling frozen, numb and having no emotional capacity.
Great sex, intimacy and self-pleasure requires us to be active and engaged while also being relaxed, calm and open.
It could be very beneficial to stop using the vibrator and explore your self-pleasure practice with the intention of rediscovering relaxed and expansive arousal. Natural vibration can be discovered using a crystal pleasure wand.
Clients who have done this have expressed a huge improvement in the way their body experiences pleasure, and after only one week.
If relaxed and expansive arousal feels like something you’d like to learn more about please get in touch, I have so much more to share with you.